MY WIFE IS CHEATING ON ME
This is how you save the relationship
Hardly anything can ruin a happy relationship dynamic more than the suspicion that “my wife is cheating on me”. Especially when the suspicion is confirmed, many men are overwhelmed and do not know or know. Out of ignorance, they often choose to step back fearfully instead of courageously taking the step forward.
This article is about “My wife is cheating on me “. How you can deal with it, how it can even enrich you and your life, and possibly usher in a new level of your partnership.
Table of contents of the article
Table of contents of the article
1. The bleeding wound of ignorance
2. Say it out — go into dialogue
3. My wife is cheating on me
4. Talk to each other honestly and sensibly
5. Faith and trust in her words
6. The fraud is pronounced — clarify your relationship
7. The honor of the man
8. My wife cheats on me, and so we deal with it
9. The partnership reaches a more profound level
10. More individuality and intimacy
11. The rebirth of the relationship
12. My wife is cheating on me — then go to your buddies
1) THE BLEEDING WOUND OF IGNORANCE
Before getting any concrete advice on how to deal with it, it is necessary to gain clarity. Many men BELIEVE that they are being cheated on, but do not know.
Jealousy, doubt, and loss of trust creep into the relationship more and more. Such a condition can be even more destructive than the deception itself.
Recovering the ex and starting a passionate, intimate relationship with her is neither difficult nor complicated. It is more a question of technology that builds on your strength as a man. Internalize these seven fundamental rules of masculinity, and your ex will not overlook your development as a man. And want you back.
Such one-sided suspicion is like cancer that threatens to eat you up from within. You start to be disgusted and suspicious of the people you love.
You start to question everything critically, to stalk, to read secret WhatsApp, SMS, emails, and Facebook messages. The mind is delusionally focused on knowing that the suspicion is confirmed. Especially when no clear evidence is found, the search for it is often all the more desperate.
2) SAY IT OUT — GO INTO DIALOGUE
It is important to maintain calm and inner clarity. Sit down and write down why you think your partner is cheating on you. Write down the things that make you suspect. Make a list of it and read it through. At this point, you may already be able to tell whether the suspicion is justified or not.
This reasoned argument changes your powerless feeling of jealousy. Believe me, and you will gain more control and clarity over it. It also helps when dealing with your wife that you can stay in a more controlled, relaxed, and constructive dialogue.
According to the suspicious list, check for yourself what you would like to have from your partner so that the feeling of fraud can heal. What is your need for your partner? Write that down too! These written words in front of your hands give you the right awareness to enter into a constructive dialogue with your wife.
3) MY WIFE IS CHEATING ON ME
As mentioned at the beginning, I am not a fan of sniffing or other stuff afterwards because it intensifies the problem rather than solving it. I am a Freud frank debate. When dealing with her, make sure not to emotionally push her into the corner or threaten her, but to create a space in which open and honest exchange is possible.
That means don’t shout at them but talk to each other in a reasonable tone. If your emotions are too strong, I advise you to let off some steam beforehand. Go as a game of sports or yell in the car like a madman. Nobody hears you there anyway. You can roar thoughtlessly and let everything out.
4) TALK TO EACH OTHER HONESTLY AND SENSIBLY
If instead, you went into dialogue with her, foaming with anger, your wife would be intimidated and would lie rather than tell the truth. This is also quite normal because she wants to protect herself out of fear.
If the emotions boil too much during the conversation because you realize that my wife is cheating on me, it is perfectly okay to ask for a break. As soon as the emotions have calmed down, the discussion can continue in a sensible and solution-oriented manner.
Such a conversation could look something like this:
“Kathrin, I want to speak to you. I feel like you are cheating on me. This and that ( list ) made me suspect. I think a growing dislike for you that threatens to affect my relationship with you.
My need is … (Here are the things that you want or that meet your needs) . How do you perceive that?
If the suspicion is out of thin air, then I ask you to respond understandingly and lovingly to both my needs.
However, if the suspicion is correct, I ask you to be honest with me, as I stand before you.
Nothing is more important to me than bringing clarity to our relationship — no matter what it looks like. «
With this pronunciation, you mentioned your fears and your needs. You can’t do more, and now it depends on how she reacts. Incidentally, women usually also sense that something is wrong with the relationship. In most cases, you will long for such a clarifying conversation so that your relationship dynamics can become clear again.
5) FAITH AND TRUST IN HER WORDS
It is important in the next step that you also believe their words or acknowledge them as accurate and trust them. If you are no longer able to do this, then only the trip to the couple therapist or the separation helps. You would no longer be able to communicate and could not trust your partner unconditionally — so no relationship based on love makes sense.
She could assure you that she never cheated on you and loves you with all her heart, but you wouldn’t believe her. This would mean that you would ask her to do something that she cannot give you — and that is not the basis for a working relationship.
Interestingly, most jealousy thoughts originate from earlier episodes of your life. To make you understand what I mean by this, I have summarized this fact in this short video — take a look and see if you don’t even discover yourself there again.
6) THE FRAUD IS PRONOUNCED — CLARIFY YOUR RELATIONSHIP
You may have gone beyond the point and know that your wife is cheating on you. You caught her or she confessed to you. The facts are there, and the next question is how to proceed. At this point, many men try to learn as little as possible about cheating. Or they throw the blame on the partner.
Both ways are not capable but reinforce the distance between you.
One way suppresses the topic — the other focuses on personal insult and damage to the ego. The personal growth, as well as the possible relationship growth, lies in considering the problem. Therefore, focus on answering the following priorities:
First of all, ask yourself whether you can still imagine a relationship with a partner who has cheated? If that is not possible for you under any circumstances, further contact also makes no sense.
However, if you are willing to look beyond this and focus on a shared relationship, you need to learn more about the causes. The following questions should help you:
Did she cheat once or several times?
What was the goal of cheating?
What needs should you be satisfied with?
Why didn’t she talk to you about it beforehand?
And what has changed for them as a result?
And how does she imagine a future relationship together?
Or. does she imagine a casual relationship?
These questions give a new perspective. Instead of asking questions that only offend the man’s ego and reduce the woman’s value, the focus will be on the motives. I will also tell you immediately why this is so important and fosters relationships.
7) THE HONOR OF THE MAN
Before that, however, I would like to add another aspect. I know that many men see cheating as a quick break in their relationship. I think this is foolish for the following reason:
There is a lot of work, dedication, compromise, love, and shared experiences in a solid partnership.
Sex is a common aspect of it. And yes, sex is something very intimate and familiar. But at the same time, it is only one aspect of a working partnership. Many long-term companies even go one step further and emancipate themselves from the idea of monogamous sexuality.
They open up and experience completely new qualities of an intimate partnership with refreshing sexual impulses. Of course, cheating on women can also cause trust and ego to break.
But if sex after x years of relationship is still such a unique and severe aspect of the partnership that a misstep leads to separation, then I tell you, the link was not on a good foundation . Especially after several years of community life, many other pillars should be the foundation of your relationship.
Pillars that take years to gain strength and scope. This pillar could be intimacy, honesty, belonging, projects achieved, goals achieved, shared experiences, going through difficult times, and profoundly connected love. Sex, on the other hand, is a pillar that can be lived out with another person within minutes.
All it takes is a little alcohol, a stressful time, a short distance from your loved one, and that’s it. What man has never thought about a misstep in the intoxication of alcohol or other drugs? Fortunately, the temptation isn’t there every time, but if it were there, cheating would be the most normal thing in the world — and maybe it is.
Ultimately, this also reflects the adventure that has often been lost in long-term partnerships. And that is what the focus should be on the experience or the motivation of the misstep — not the failure itself! Find out in our free masculinity mail how you can keep the passion and adventure spirit glowing in your relationship in the long term!
8) MY WIFE CHEATS ON ME, AND SO WE DEAL WITH IT
However, none of this means that you shouldn’t be angry and hurt. It’s just human and completely okay. I wish to point out not to throw the shotgun straight away, but to look constructively ahead. Because the moment it is said, and you realize, “My wife is cheating on me “, your relationship dies … And she is born again.
Of course, your conversation can also lead to a relationship. This is also perfectly fine and better than trying for months with jealousy and other feelings to keep a sinking boat afloat.
There are two people in a relationship. If a person decides to go their separate ways, a link is no longer possible. In that case, you should let them go. After all, you shouldn’t stop hikers.
If such an end is in the offing, it is better to quickly draw a line and look openly into the future. If you want, you can arrange a mutual break beforehand and get back together in a few weeks.
But most such solutions are clear signs that the partnership is over. In such a case, you might be interested in this article here. It deals with the most skilful way of dealing with a relationship and taking the experience of the link into your future life as a useful resource.
9) THE PARTNERSHIP REACHES A DEEPER LEVEL
However, if you can look past their misstep, you have given your true feelings, authentically expression (yes, you can be angry, sad, etc.!). You decide to still maintain your relationship, and it is only now that things get going.
Because this event allows you to take your relationship to a deeper level, this often gives rise to an entirely new feeling of affection and love.
You would not be the first couple to experience a much more intense relationship dynamic through a partner’s misstep (my wife cheats on me). Jealousy and distrust are often closer to love and ecstasy than most would think.
Recognize for both of you what potential freedom and development opportunities are suddenly opening up. You can talk about your true desires, dreams, and fantasies on a much deeper level. Maybe you will recognize a common intersection of sexual desires that you can now bring to life together piece by piece.
10) MORE INDIVIDUALITY AND INTIMACY
Such an event inevitably leads to you meeting each other even more honestly. You get to know each other again in a completely new and much more intimate way than ever before. Your individuality within your relationship takes on a whole new quality.
People find themselves attractive because of their similarities. We love someone mainly because of his / her mistakes. Mistakes make us kind because they show that we are vulnerable and not perfect.
They show that we are made up of flesh, blood, and feelings. It is such crises that reveal the actual value of love. The more we share our imperfect positions with our partner, the higher the level of intimacy and love.
11) THE REBIRTH OF THE RELATIONSHIP
“My wife is cheating on me,” can be a traumatic rupture in a partnership. However, the rejection of this topic does not bring anything; only the open discussion of it leads to growth. Explore the resources you can draw from it and define new goals for you in your partnership. It’s only really starting now.
An important step, which I would like to mention, is the ability to forgive and let go. If the partner cannot overlook the misstep and continues to be like a virus between you, you often do not use any further steps.
The partner continues to nibble on missteps and loss of trust. Overcoming the issue in this way often takes time, good buddies, and enjoyable experiences. The power of good buddies is often underestimated and is so important!
12) MY WIFE IS CHEATING ON ME — THEN GO TO YOUR BUDDIES
You can get advice from your buddies, exchange your worries and experiences, and strengthen yourself in your husband. The reinforcement of being a man is significant at this moment. Sexual deception by women feels like many men have lost their masculinity.
As if another man had robbed their tailor as if they weren’t potent enough. Many believe that women build the male’s potency, but that’s not true.
You get masculinity, being a man, and irresistible attraction, especially from men. There you recharge your masculine batteries, with which you can strengthen your relationship.
The same principle applies to women among women. However, many men let their friendly contacts slip as soon as they have a girlfriend. This works well for a while, but often, the man’s important qualities are left behind after a while.
Women then complain that he is no longer like a man, but more like a little boy. They often cheat on your husband because there is nothing left of the original masculinity. They have lost their wild masculinity — the brave and constant at the same time.
If that was the reason, I strongly advise you to spend more time with your buddies. It sounds paradoxical, but it is precisely this time that makes you attractive to women. From your buddies, you get what you can’t get from women.
Fraternity, male self-confidence, energy, drive, and polar passion!
They are also the ones who help you, among other things, over relationship crises and make you feel like a potent man again. A man, your wife, is attracted to and with whom she wants to spend time in love!
